Family

What It’s Like Being A Speech Delayed Mom

Many people think that having a speech delayed child is no big deal. Of course its not a big deal until you actually have a child with a speech and language delay. It is definitely not the end of the world and all children develop at different stages on their own time. But it can be so overwhelming at times.

 

” How do you know my child is at high risk for delays ?”

These were the first words out of my mouth after an occupational therapist suggested early intervention. How could this woman tell me this when she barely knew my child for 20 minutes and he was ONE years old. He was fussy that day .  I found myself getting so defensive and hurt. I honestly did not know how I felt .

As a mom, this is a big deal.

It hurts just to get those child development evaluations about your child’s current stage. Start learning colors? He doesn’t even speak clear. Everything is blue or yellow.

Saying shapes ? He doesn’t pronounce his name right. It hurts to hear all those stories about how other kids someone knows started talking late or how common it is.  You don’t want your child to be behind. You don’t know if your child will get picked on or mocked for not talking.You never really know if you’re making the right decision. But you learn to trust your gut and be an advocate.  Kids are mean sometimes. They already notice  that he doesn’t talk and point it out.  They call him a baby. You don’t know if your child is hurt by it  because he can’t even tell you .

The constant fears settle in from time to time. Will my child be able to be mainstreamed ? Will he outgrow this ? Will his diagnosis turn into something else ? It hurts and is frustrating having a child who is speech delayed. It also hurts to admit that because you feel horrible saying it. I feel horrible saying my son has special needs. But I shouldn’t. My son is amazing. He is so smart and one of a kind. He is always smiling and I know he is happy. This is a new and special journey. No  mom wants her child to be behind or suffer. Every mom questions if it was something she did wrong, or didn’t do, when her child has any issue. The self-blame is strong.

When my son had a rough start in to the world, I blamed myself. Did I do something wrong ? Was it because Im a hairdresser and Im around chemicals ? Did I eat something wrong ? I had absolutely no idea my son was going to be born with an airway and heart defect. I had no idea it could lead to his delays. I had no idea my son could qualify for a diagnosis of intellectual delay.

Truth is , none of it matters because Ive learned that  I can only stress about certain things until I cross those bridges. He is my miracle. My children are my everything . I will do everything in my power to be the best advocate and support for them .

It hurts to be told not to worry about the speech delay. He will outgrow it. It hurts to be asked ” What is wrong with your son ? ”

That’s easy for someone to say who hasn’t gone through it, or whose kid advanced with therapy and was done with it almost before they even  started. Your child still struggles no matter how hard you feel like you give.

It hurts to see your child struggle. It’s a helpless, frustrating feeling to see what he goes through and to not be able to make it all better as fast as you want it too. It hurts knowing how fast time flies as you head to therapy and your child has a much busier schedule than you . Its exhausting.

Its both beautiful priceless.  My son is a gift from God and he has taught me so much about life in general. I love my children and Im so blessed to be their mommy.

 

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