The last few months have been a little crazy. We’ve had so much fun getting out with the kids this summer. But truth is, I have no idea where June and July went. I can’t believe how fast the year is flying by. You with me ?
With the kids being off from school, our usual routine was thrown off. We had an amazing summer together and I try to always remember to give myself some grace in the midst of the chaos. We even had some relatives visit from out of state which was nice.
I’ve decided to turn my blog in to a documentary of our lives with a sprinkle of lifestyle and motherhood tips. It’s therapeutic for me. Things have been pretty tough this month and I can feel myself coming out of the funk I’ve been in . On a good note, I have been introduced with such amazing opportunities that continue to show me I’m doing exactly what I’ve been called to do in my life. We also just celebrated our 8th wedding Anniversary after being together for 17 years! We’ve been through so much together and I’m so grateful for it all. We’ve both grown so much since being little teens and our marriage is beautiful . We’re both busy with personal goals and projects all while trying to make time for ourselves. He is a keeper .
First off, do you ever look at your kids and just ask yourself ” Where the heck is time going ? “
I can’t believe how fast my daughter is growing. She just started second grade . I look at her and I’m in awe with the little girl she is becoming. It seems like everything has been an argument lately and she sure enjoys making sure I understand that she is a big girl now. I just adore her and want to encourage her to be herself and speak her truth . This summer we took a break from Girl Scouts aside from having their Brownie Bridging Ceremony and camping at the zoo. Volunteering to be her Troop Leader has been an amazing experience .
I told myself that I would figure it out along the way because this is something that Ava and I can do together. Every now and then that mom guilt sets in and I think that I need to give my daughter more attention in the midst of this new extra needs journey with my son . Our new Troop season starts in October and I’m heading in to this new season positive and optimistic because I have one year under my belt. I’m learning as I go and this is such an amazing opportunity for our girls. I plan on delegating more with the parents , being more organized with my meetings, and creating some awesome memories with the girls! I’ve told myself that being busy is a privilege . Being busy is good as long as you stop to smell the roses and learn to give yourself some grace along the way .
My son just started preschool. He is 4 years old and this will be his second year of school. Its been a while since I’ve shared much about our journey in here . I guess you can say I’ve been a tad paralyzed with fear and the constant reminder that everyone sure has an opinion with how they think children should be raised or their way is the right way. The reality is that my reality is hard sometimes. One thing that was really bothering me was that anytime I shared anything , I felt like people or even my husband would say ” Why are you sharing that?” or ” Well… it doesn’t look like anything is wrong with your son ” Then I would feel like I was opening up myself to opinions that I just did not feel like hearing. I’ve come to realize that I’m not alone and some other parents have bigger problems . So if you can relate at all with my journey, please be sure to connect with me!
Truth is that there is nothing wrong with my son. He has an ability is how I like to see it . One thing I find super frustrating is how long it takes to just get some answers . Not just that, but I hate that children have to be labeled to get some help . My goal is to be the best mom I can be for my kids and to put my family first before anything. Elijah’s diagnosis at three years old was a speech and language impairment and a developmental delay. That is when a lot of doors to new resources opened up for us. For the longest time, my husband and I were so financially drained with co-pays, opinions, evaluations, check ups, and worries. We have found that we are his voice and we have to do whats best for him . Not just that, but those diagnosis’ mean nothing. We treat him normal except we’re learning more and more about how important it is to be patient and more understanding to his behaviors.
I’m blessed in the sense that I’ve been able to get my son some intervention since we was two years old. For the longest time, he was receiving early intervention, occupational therapy, speech, and physical therapy. We later added behavioral therapy too. I found an incredible therapy based preschool that is perfect for him and we discontinued therapy. Our local school district did not make it easy to get him qualified to get there and the whole process was long- But worth it .
My anxiety has been through the roof lately because I’ve been over- thinking and playing scenarios in my head about the transition from preschool to kinder. Then I start asking myself if this district is even right for him. The biggest hurdle are the tantrums and the behavioral and sensory issues he tends to have at times. I go back and forth about seeking ABA Therapy for him . I was hesitant about whether or not I should seek such an aggressive therapy for all of us . The worst part was that I finally decided to go for it because I do not want him to think that its ok to act the way he does when he doesnt get him way at times. He is such a smart cookie and super receptive. He understands everything you say . His attention span is super short at times, he has been having many accidents with potty training when he’s been potty trained for almost a year now , and he can get pretty defiant quick. It takes some work to calm him down. He gets loud, whiny, and will zone out when he gets over – stimulated. His vocabulary has increased and I hear him trying to say new words and sounds. He is constantly improving at his own pace and I just have to meet him where he is at.
Now I know it sounds like I’m complaining here, but this is my normal. This is what I’ve been dealing with and as Elijah’s mom, I only want whats best for him. So after finally calling to get approved for this therapy, ofcourse my PPO won’t cover it . So I tried with our secondary insurance for him and found out they would only cover him if he has a diagnosis of Autism. This is when reality sank in for me recently. There is a possibility that my child could be on the spectrum. Now I’ve been waiting for answers for the longest time but his pediatrician and director of his school both say sure he has delays that are similar, but he does not meet that box. I personally am not ready to have another psychologist evaluate my child. I would like to give it more time because Im already doing everything I need to do to get him the help he needs. We have a consultation next month for genetic testing and that alone is a lot to think about right now .
So in a nutshell, my thoughts and emotions have been all over the place. Answers will come and either way, it doesn’t matter to me if my child gets another diagnosis . A diagnosis does not define your child and only gets them more help. But sometimes I do feel like children are over diagnosed the second a medical professional evaluates them . That’s my personal opinion. But truth is, as his mom, I know him better than anyone. I know I sound like an in denial parent, but I’m just speaking from the heart here. This is all so new for me. He is a normal 4 year old little guy who loves nerf guns, playdoh, and tools. He loves people. He is social, friendly, compassionate, and outgoing. He even looks you in the eyes. I feel like sometimes they just want to put a label on your child in order to open up some additional resources for them. These thoughts I have are really hard for me to explain . But time, faith, prayer , and patience is what we have. I’m so thankful for his incredible team of teachers/ therapists who take the time to talk to me and and offer comfort and tips. We have to trust the process because everyone is unique and different.
Aside from heading to the salon on my work days, my workouts and my coaching business have been an amazing outlet for me. I’ve taken a step back in the sense where I’m focusing on family and marriage before anything. My wellness is the biggest priority right now and my wellness groups mean the world to me . I love waking up to my amazing rock stars striving to be better versions of themselves and making themselves a priority too. I’m blessed with this incredible gift of helping others live healthier and more fulfilling lives too. Beachbody has changed my life for the better. I do not know where I would be if I didn’t have these incredible workouts and nutrition guidance. The old me would be eating everything in plain site and probably at an unhealthy weight. My wellness journey and coaching business is a way for me to give back and feel good at the same time. Thank goodness my husband and I are on the same page and stronger than ever. If we weren’t, I think I would literally be broken . I’m so blessed .
They say when you’re feeling down, the best thing to do is to turn it around and use that energy to help others.
Sometimes we have to remember that life can get pretty messy . That’s just how it is. Our mess is what others might be praying for. I tend to keep myself super busy and I’m learning to let go and just slow down .
We have so much to be thankful for and I’m looking forward to our family vacation coming up!
Our biggest fear is failure. People can be so quick to give up on themselves, quit or throw in the towel! Don’t view failing that way. Just because you failed at something does not make YOU a failure!! There is a difference. It’s not about the mistakes and failures you have in life, but it has EVERYTHING to do with how you handle them!! Learn and grow from your situation. This is what determines your outcome, and determines whether you move forward in life or remain the same.
The ONLY way to FAIL is if YOU quit, stop, or do nothing. Instead, use these mistakes and failures as moments you learn and grow from! What can you learn from this to become better? Some things have happened to me in my personal life lately which have reminded me how important it is to ground myself when my life seems off balance. It’s ok to step away from one thing and revisit the other that seems to be off balance. At this point in my life, I truly feel as though there is no such thing as the perfect work, life and family balance. There is no such thing as that picture perfect life. Most people paint this facade and in reality, they are the ones afraid to reveal who they really are. Your happiness matters and it feels good to be real and be true to yourself. There will be people who question you or who think their route is the way to go. There will be people who simply don’t understand and never will. Then there are the people who have no drive what so ever and want to just settle for the easy way. There will also be the people who you once thought were your friends, yet they were nowhere when you really needed them the most. We all are on our own journey. Just smile, run with the willing, and don’t waste your time dwelling on what didn’t happen. What works for someone else , might not work for you. The most important thing is that you keep pushing forward and don’t stop fighting for what you want or believe in.Forget the nay sayers or the opinions of others. Those will always be there. Everyone has an opinion. One thing Im learning is that I don’t have to sit around and accept those opinions and let them get to me. I am in control of my life. I choose how I want to react to situations. There is no straight line to success with anything in life. It’s a jagged road with bumps, cliffs, twists and turns…..boy do I know this already! But if you can make it through all of that, the destination will be BEAUTIFUL and so worth it!!
Take it one day at a time! Don’t be afraid to fail!! If you are not failing, then you are not GROWING! We only have one life and we should all be encouraging each other to be better and do better things in this world! The best way to succeed is to help others. Just like one of my favorite mentors says, ” The secret to living is giving.” Never stop learning and always do more. Don’t settle for mediocrity. It all starts with being OK with making mistakes and failing. We fall, we learn from our mistakes, we redirect and we take that knowledge and use it to MOVE FORWARD. The most successful people in this world, are the ones who FAILED the most. Always remind yourself why you are working so hard and keep pushing yourself. I know my why, do you?